The hospice nurse and I met with "Linda" today to admit her mother to our hospice program. While Linda and I were sitting at her kitchen table, she began to share the tragic story of how her grandson was murdered. Her tears flowed so easily while she was talking. She easily shared the pain of her grief while holding my hand. I sensed that she felt some support and relief while talking about her dear grandson.
Linda shared that music and prayer helps her cope with life's tough times. She is doing what she needs to do to help her cope, but grief always has a way of surprising one while showing up so unexpected.
Linda's mother is ninety-five and has had a long and fulfilling life. She has struggled a bit with heart failure, but was able to live her life her way until recently. Her mother is declining a bit each day and with that decline, Linda's grief is strong. Linda has a huge family that is very supportive to her and her mother. I know she will get through this tough time with her singing, her prayers and her family. And then, every now and then a strong reminder will surface resurfacing the pain of her grandson's death. I pray for her strength.
THREE YEARS AGO
The tears always will flow
when talking about her grandson.
He had just turned sixteen
when he was brutally murdered
just three years ago.
They shot and killed him
because he wouldn't do what they wanted.
They were searching for his friend
and demanded answers from him.
The police never found his body,
but the two of them will serve
a life time sentence of 108 years
with no possibility of ever receiving parole.
Now her mom is dying
after living over ninety years.
She struggles to let her mother go
as she so knows the compelling pain of loss.
Her grief is compounded
as it is, again, bringing up
those painful memories
of losing her grandson just three years ago.
Grief and loss are powerful emotions.
No one ever gets a free pass.
Sadly it will continue to happen now and again
as her grandson's grief is
forevermore.
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