A TYPICAL GUY

Seventy year old “Susan” suffers from end stage heart disease. She has been divorced for years and raised her three children alone. Her son, “Pete”, who is a twin, lives next door with his wife, “Alicia”, and their eight week old son. They all reside in a duplex and share one main wall.

Pete’s twin brother was killed in a car accident ten years ago when he was just twenty-two years old. Susan also has a daughter, “Jillian”, who lives nearby. All three of them are devoted to Susan and help out frequently.

When I first met Susan a week ago, she was struggling with panic attacks at night that interrupted her sleeping. With an adjustment in her medication, she is now sleeping well throughout the night. The family purchased a baby monitor in order to be able to hear Susan in their half of the duplex in case she needs any help.

Susan is very insightful and shared that she has had some trouble letting go as she wants to remain as independent as she can. She says she initially fought against anything that might impact that independence. She felt that the baby monitor was an intrusion into her life, but now realizes that it is there for her benefit. She says she has slowly come to terms with these changes.

I met Pete for the first time today. I made a late appointment so I could meet him after his work day. Pete was asking many detailed questions as was trying to understand what was available to his family. While talking, Pete was quietly standing behind his mother, who was sitting at the kitchen table, massaging her neck.

One could see the love he had for his mother in his eyes. All of his questions revolved around her care and what supports are available. He is an engineer by trade, and one would not be surprised by the questions he asked as they were all from his brain. But, it his actions that told his truth as they came from his heart.

He is a son, any mother would be proud. And I know Susan is.


A TYPICAL GUY
　

Many may see him
as a typical guy.
Things are black or white,
on or off, good or bad.

He’s into finite precision
with his engineering mind.
He’ll focus on one small detail
as he struggles to find his truth.

He wants to make her better.
He wants to fix what’s wrong.
So many questions on his mind.
He wants to know what he can do.

He’ll drop what he is doing
the moment that she calls.
He’ll massage her neck as long as needed
to help relieve her muscle pain.

He loves her with all his heart.
You can see it in his actions;
you can see it in his eyes;
you can see it in his heart.

So I guess it’s true,
after all
       he is just
              a typical guy.