I AM BACK

My son was infected by a rare bacteria that attacked his colon. The Department of Health said that he received it from a restaurant.   His surgeon said that he had never had a patient before with this infection.  It was, at that time, that we were told that he would be able to have the surgery reversed six to twelve months later. 

Two weeks ago, we returned to be with him during that second surgery.  It was a relief knowing that it was also successful and that he can return to his normal life upon recovery.  His dad and I returned home, although I was still feeling stress over this entire experience.  

Three days later, I returned to work.  It was then that I realized I was back to my normal.  I hadn’t realized that the stress hadn’t totally left me for eight months.  I know it is a “Mom” thing, but it surely did surprise me.  It is wonderful to be back to my old self.  I am again truly happy and upbeat.  This experience was such a perfect awareness of how important pure love is.  It is not things that you do, but it comes from deep in one’s heart.  Whoever I need to thank, I hope they hear.  “Thank you for this beautiful awareness”.

I AM BACK 

 

Eight months ago, he had emergency surgery.

It was a very rare infection that killed his colon.

I was by his side during his 22-day hospitalization;

wanting to fix things; wanting to say the right words.

 

I felt that I should know better; I should know what to do;

as I have counseled caregivers my entire career.

But then, he is my son; forever twelve in my mind.

I’m his mother, I should fix things; make it all better.

 

We traveled back to be with him again two weeks ago.

He had his second surgery to put things back in order.

He was in the hospital only overnight as all went well.

He will soon be back-to-normal again.

 

Stress stayed with me even when we arrived back home.

I returned to work three days later; thankful to have normal again.

I was happily singing to the music on the radio

as I was driving to do a nearby admission.

 

I love to sing when I am listening to music as I drive.

It made me realize that I hadn’t sang in the car for months.

It was then that I totally understood;

                  “I am back!!!”