WHY?

The hospice nurse and I went out to admit, “Christine”, thirty-three years old, to our hospice program.  Approximately one year ago, Christine was diagnosed with Stomach Cancer.  She had surgery at that time with follow up chemotherapy.  Two days after she was diagnosed, Christine’s husband died suddenly from pneumonia.  

Christine lives with her mother, “Louise”, who is her primary caregiver.  At the beginning of the visit, Louise told us about the time her daughter was diagnosed.  Within a course of the next three weeks, Louise lost her son-in-law, a nephew and two friends.  All were sudden deaths and without warning. 

Louise was honest regarding her grief and emotions.  She felt overwhelmed by it all.  With so many deaths within such a short period, it is almost impossible to grieve it all at once.   We grieve differently with each person as we have a different relationship with everyone we know. 

Fortunately, Louise is very involved with her Christian Church Community.  She says she goes to her pray meeting each week.  She has good support from her family and many friends.  Hopefully, in time, she will be able to grieve in a way that will work for her.   There are no words to express that can ever explain any of this at all.  I wish the best for this family as that is all that I can give.

WHY?

 

We went out to admit her daughter to hospice.

She was diagnosed, just one year ago this month,

with Stomach Cancer that had already spread.

Although she’s had treatment, she’s starting to decline.

 

Two days later, her daughter’s husband suddenly died.

Pneumonia was the battle he could not survive.

Then, the following week, her best friend,

without warning, collapsed and quicky passed away.

 

She was appropriately struggling with her grief,

but the losses weren’t quite yet over for her.

Ten days later, her nephew and another good friend

died suddenly; only four days apart.

 

Without any awareness, there were four deaths,

along with her daughter’s cancer diagnosis,

all within a three-week time period. 

All sudden, without any forewarning at all.

 

She had to go on leave from her job.

“I could not concentrate at all.

My mind was overcome with shock; with grief.

I still cannot process it all”.

 

Why in the world did this happen?

Was it just a horrific, random act;

or was it all just meant to be?

It would help to know the reason why.

 

I know that there are likely no set answers.

I also know I will likely never learn.

But that will not ever stop me

from continuing to ask my simple question;

                    Why?