LIKE MY DAD

Jim, a very young eighty-eight year old, suffers from lung cancer. Jim has been on hospice for about six weeks, although is doing quite well. Jim lives alone and is very capable. He had just gotten home from volunteering at a food bank serving breakfast to the homeless, when I arrived for our scheduled visit.

Jim is married to “Lois”. It is a second marriage for both of them. Jim and Lois had been dating for twenty years prior to getting married four years ago. Jim said they tried living together, but it didn’t work out well. Lois lives nearby and is very involved in Jim’s life. The two love each other deeply and this arrangement serves them both quite well.

On my previous visits, Lois and Jim’s daughter were visiting. Today it was just Jim and me. Jim started talking about his volunteer work. His stories evolved into other humanistic activities that he participates in. Jim is very generous with his time and really cares about fellow human beings.

Jim reminds me so much of my own dad. Coincidently, my dad’s name was also Jim. Additionally, Jim is not only built like my father, their personalities are also very similar. My father died ten years ago and I miss him every day. My father gave me unconditional love. I tell folks, “He believed I walked on water, and I know he did.”

During the course of our visit, Jim asked me if I wanted to take a walk. We took a fifteen minute walk through a park near his home. I have never taken a walk with a patient, but immediately said yes when Jim asked me if I wanted to do so. Most of the walk was on a asphalt trail, but on the parts where it was uneven and rocky, Jim gently took a hold of my hand. It was such a natural gesture.

He started talking about his family and situations where he has helped out when someone was in need. Jim gives of his time which is tremendous. He gives from his heart; his presence.

I had so many reminders of my own father with Jim. My dad occasionally called me “Sweetheart” and when Jim did so today, it felt so amazing. I still miss my dad each and every day. I am so appreciative that there are many “Jims” out there making this world a much better place.


LIKE MY DAD
　

He is tall and slender.
His heart is as big as they come.
His name is Jim.
Like my dad.

He brings me tender memories.
Reminders of the days long past.
Kindness, generosity, thoughtfulness.
Like my dad.

We took a short walk through the park.
He sharing stories of his travels; his family.
Gently reaching for my hand for support
when the terrain became uneven; slippery.

It felt so natural; him and me.
Walking side by side sharing stories;
about love;
         about life;
                  about him.

We said goodbye at his front door.
“Thank you for coming; for listening to me.
Have a good day, Sweetheart”.
It was magical; beautiful;
         just like my dad.