COPE

A patient comes onto hospice secondary to a medical diagnosis.  I strongly encourage patients and families to call hospice with any medical question or need as our phone gets picked up 24/7.  I then will add that non-medical events occur as well. That is the role and support of the social worker.  A big part of that is bereavement, grief and loss.  Asking someone about how they cope, is such a huge part of grief.   Quite often, a large part of the social work role is active listening, validating and normalizing.  However anyone feels is a normal emotion or reaction.  I will hear “Thank you” frequently, as folks often think that there are rules that accompany grief.   Not at all.  It is rewarding knowing that we can support patients and families their way.

COPE 

 

During a hospice admission,

I will characteristically ask, “How do you cope?”,

as we are always there for the patients;

for the family and the caregivers as well.

 

I often hear similar answers such as;

“I reach out to family; I run; I strum my guitar”.

I also will hear, “I garden; I golf;

                            I play with my grandkids”.

 

Some may have no answer at all.

They truly don’t know what helps them cope.

Most all, naturally, want to diminish their grief;

so hopefully, they are pursuing some behavior that helps.

 

Then there are others who use humor to cope.

It so takes the edge off; it lightens the load.

When I asked him today, what helps him cope;

I laughed when I heard, “I smoke a stiff joint”.

 

Being the caregiver for both of her parents;

she, on the other hand, has a spiritual side.

She touched my heart so deeply when I heard;

“I walk my dog along the river

                          while listening to the birds”.