SHE NEVER LAUGHED

The hospice nurse and I went out to admit, “Laurie”, to hospice.  Laurie had surgery about one month ago and was recovering in a Nursing Home.  Unfortunately, she was having very slow recovery.  Laurie’s biggest wish was to be able to return home.  She lived in the country on her daughter’s property about an hour drive away.  Laurie had only one daughter, “Tess”, with whom she adopted.    Laurie so loved her daughter and simply wanted to just get home. 

 

Laurie had a strong, rough voice.  She strongly spoke her truth about some of the nursing home staff.  She either loved someone unconditionally or did not want them around.  There was no in between.  Laurie tried to talk tough, but her big heart did shine through.  When she spoke down about someone, it just wasn’t in her heart to mean it that deeply.  It sounded so dramatic; so theatrical, that it would make me laugh.  Laurie got a kick out of my laughing, which in return would make her softly laugh too. 

 

After we left Laurie, I called her daughter, Tess, to update her on the visit.  Tess was so surprised that her mother laughed during out visit as strongly stated, “She never laughs!”.  Tess also spoke about wanting her mother home.  Tess said, “She adopted me at age eight.  She taught me morality”.  One could hear the love Tess and her mother had for each other.  It was beautiful. 

 

The hospice nurse and I were surprised to hear that Laurie died two days after our admission.   I called Tess today to offer condolences and support.  It was then she told me about her appreciation for our hospice visit as it made her mother laugh.  She deeply felt it was a gift that was given to her mother.  To me, laughter is number one.  It takes the edge off of life’s challenges quite often.  If I laugh with you, I will love you.  Nothing more. 

SHE NEVER LAUGHED  

 

We met her Wednesday at the nursing home. 

She was a “straight-shooter”; always stating her truth. 

She spoke about the good, the bad, the ugly; 

about those who intermingled in her life. 

 

She was always realistic no matter what. 

She was so true about herself as well as others. 

She had hopes of returning home soon,  

but also, aware it may not happen at all. 

 

She spoke of her anger at certain staff. 

Her words were so powerful; yet theatrical. 

She would easily make me laugh. 

She then would quietly laugh as well. 

 

I later shared with her daughter our visit. 

I stated appreciation of her mother’s honesty; 

her mother’s reality; her mother’s laughter. 

She surprisingly then stated, “She never laughs!” 

 

On Saturday, she died peacefully in her sleep. 

I called her daughter to offer condolences and support. 

She shared, “It was a better way for her to go. 

               Quietly in peace and in comfort.” 

 

She then amazingly, softly added; 

“Thank you.  You were meant to be there. 

You made her laugh at the end of her life. 

You gave comfort; a little bit of joy 

to my somber, serious mother 

               who never, ever laughed.”