I WANT TO

Being a hospice admission social worker, my days are frequently full.  Now and then, I reach out to my social work peers to see if there are any visits or phone calls that I can help with.  Today one social worker asked if I could visit two patients in a local nursing home.  Our hospice has a policy that if a patient has less than two weeks to live, a nurse or a social worker need to visit on a daily basis. 

Each patient I visited had a family member sitting by the bedside.  “Nancy”, eighty-five, was in a deep sleep.  She appeared to be unresponsive.  She has not eaten for four days as, per her daughter. “Julie”.  Nancy chose to stop eating as has told her family, “I want all of this to be over.”  She was very depressed over her dependence.  Julie and her two sisters, all wanted what was best for their mother.  They all supported their mother’s way of wanting it to be over. 

I next went to visit, “Darlene”.  Darlene resided only a few rooms down from Nancy.  She too, was unresponsive.  She did appear imminent as her breathing would stop for thirty seconds or so routinely.  Her son, “Dennis” was sitting by her side.  He pointed out to me her breathing pattern.  He, too, knew that his mother likely only has one to two days at most.  All of Darlene’s children live out of state.  Dennis informed his mother, this morning, that all four of her children will be by her side tomorrow.  Dennis is hoping his mother will hold on.  

Both of these children were focused on following their mother’s wishes.  Both easily verbalized their emotions and thoughts.  It was so obvious how much both of these children did love their mother.  I felt so honored that both, Dennis and Julie, thanked me as I was walking out the door. 

As I was driving away, my heart was so full of love and grace.  I feel so honored to do this work.  These two visits today are the perfect example of why.  

I WANT TO

Today I visited two elderly women.

Each living in the same Skilled Nursing Facility.

Both with likely just days to live.

I, wanting to give the family needed support.

 

Both women were unresponsive,

looking so comfortable without any pain.

At most, eating and drinking only sips and bites.

Sleeping most all of the day.

 

She sat so patiently next to her mother;

knowing her mother’s time is quite near.

She is at peace about it all

as this is so what her mother wants.

 

He just flew in from Alaska this morning.

So happy to be by his mother’s side.

So gently, he has whispered into her ear,

               “It is okay for you to let go.”

 

Both are happy to be by their mother’s side.

Both were deeply grieving, but able to let go.

Each did say the same thing as I was leaving,

“I want to thank you for coming.

               Your support has meant so much”.

 

My heart, so full of warmth, as I drove away.

Two back-to-back visits surrounded by love.

Both easily telling me how much I did help.

               I truly felt exactly, the same way.

 

“I want to thank you, as well,

for welcoming me into your life.

I so appreciate you sharing your truth.

This has been perfect for both you and I.

From the deepest part of my heart and soul

I want to simply just say, Thank you!”