RECEIVING

Forty-eight year old “Jennie” was diagnosed with brain cancer four months ago. She was five months away from earning her PhD in nursing when she had to quit school because of her declining health.

Jennie has been on hospice for six weeks. She has declined rapidly since that time to where now she is bedridden and no longer able to speak. Jennie’s mother, “Madeline” and sister, “Margo” are staying with Jennie to care for her.

Jennie is well loved by her large family and multitude of friends. Often during my visits, I hear about all the visitors that have come by. There are many people who all love Jennie and are devoted to her.

The family has been so welcoming to the hospice staff. The laugh easily even though times are tough. The family’s strong Catholic beliefs help them get through these difficult times. There is, in addition, a lot of laughter in the home. Their strong faith and wonderful sense of humor helps them get through each challenging day.

During my visit today, Margo and I were talking about how difficult the situation can be. In addition, we talked about some of the beautiful parts that are happening as well. I spoke about all the support they have and that “The cream always rises to the top.” This led us to talking about the gift of receiving and how difficult it is as all of us to accept help. We would rather be on the giving part of any equation.

I shared that by receiving a gift, you also give something back to others. Others feel wonderful knowing that they are able to help out. By receiving, we are able to give that wonderful feeling to them. Most of us are first in line to help another, but often struggle to receive.

As I was leaving, Margo walked me to the front door. It was then she shared she was going to quote me at her sister’s funeral. Being humbled and surprised, all I could do was hug her and say “Thank you.” Two words that barely touch the gratitude and humility I felt deep inside.


RECEIVING

　

It is so easy to help another
when asked for needed support.
We only have to hear, “Could you…?”
and are eager to jump right in.

Helping another is so rewarding.
We are honored to have been asked.
Family knowing you are always there;
an earned trust from a loyal friend.

I talk to families a lot about receiving.
I know it is a difficult gift to accept.
By receiving we give honor to another.
Acceptance is the gift we give in return.

I am no different from my families.
I, too, want to say, “No thanks, I’m doing fine.”
We hate to bother others as they have busy lives.
We feel guilty taking up their valuable time.

She told me today she was thinking about the funeral.
She is writing down what she wants to say.
She is going to quote several things I have shared with her.
I was surprised; I am humbled; I am in awe.

What a beautiful gift she gave me.
Honoring me by wanting to use my words.
With tears in my eyes, I hugged her so tightly.
She let me know I made a difference today.

It is amazing what she gave me.
Able to give to another when times are so tough.
All I could say was “Thank you”
from the deepest part of my heart.