THE MENTOR

Seventy-three year old "Jack" suffers from esophageal cancer. He has a feeding tube for nourishment as he is unable to swallow. He has swollen legs which give him intense pain as well as making it difficult for him to walk any distance.

Jack has been divorced for many years. He has three adult children who live in the area, although he has not been in contact with them for years. One of his daughters occasionally writes him a letter. He never responds back.

Jack has recently moved in with his friends, "Ted" and "Holly". The three of them all met years ago in an Alcoholic Anonymous meeting. All have been sober for more than twenty years. Ted and Holly live in a small, one bedroom mobile home. Jack sleeps in a hospital bed in the living room.

Jack counts his blessings each day, especially the friendship he has in Ted and Holly. Holly has experience being an attendant and is comfortable caring for Jack. The three of them are very close.

For the past twenty years, Jack has been a mentor to other alcoholics teaching them how to remain sober. He has touched many people with his passion for sobriety. When I visited Jack last week, he could only focus on the regrets in his life. He spoke of how he wished had had done so many things differently. He was being pretty hard on himself.

I told him that what I saw in him was his huge heart and his passion for helping others. I shared with him that I believed he had to have the experiences he had in order to be able to effectively help so many others.

When I went out to visit today, it appears that Jack is in his dying process. He is unresponsive and has stopped eating. Holly told me that a few days ago, Jack said he wanted to talk with her. He spent three hours with Holly. Holly defines it as a "soul-searching" conversation. She said that she saw it as a cleansing of his soul. She thanked me for initiating the conversation with Jack last week. She said it opened the door for the two of them to have that wonderful discussion. She feels Jack is now at peace and able to let go. I only hope that he now is aware of what a positive impact he made to others during his life.


THE MENTOR

He abused alcohol in his younger days,
though has been sober for years.
He's no longer in touch with his family.
All by his choosing, not theirs.

Now at the end of his life,
he can only focus on regrets.
He wishes he had made better choices.
He's sorry for all the bridges he's burned.

He doesn't see the good he has done,
since sobriety and he became one.
Twenty years of mentoring others.
Showing them how to stay on track.

I encouraged him to cherish his past.
It's what led him to mentor so well.
Knowing the pain and the sorrow
gave him the tools he uses each day.

He was able to process these feelings.
He was able to mourn his past.
Reaching out to those who love him
gave him the courage to peacefully let go.