I opened two patients to hospice today; both being female in their early nineties. Coincidentally, they lived about two miles away from each other. Both were widowed over twenty years and had, previously, been living alone.
Each was diagnosed three months ago; one with lung disease while the other cardiac. Both have been in a decline to where each is much weaker and losing weight due to a poor appetite. "Dot", ninety-four; was hospitalized two months ago. Her family and the doctors thought she would die while in the hospital. Dot prevailed to where she was able to return home. Dot was very wobbly on her feet with poor vision and not safe to be alone.
Dot's daughter, "Jess", lives about an hour away. Due to Jess's husband's health issues, she cannot come around as often as needed. Dot's family hired twenty-four hour attendant care. Dot has the funds to pay for the help she needs. Dot tells herself, and others, that her attendant is really just a companion. Although a struggle, Dot is determined to do housework saying she cleans one room each day.
Dot was dressed very fashionably wearing pink boots with heels to match her pink outfit. Dot walked slowly holding onto the furniture as she maneuvered around in her home. She was in denial regarding her limitations. I respect Dot's independent personality, but also know that she could put herself at risk if she had it her way.
On the other hand, "Myra", ninety-two, has totally accepted her limitations. She, too, is very weak and in a decline. She told her daughter and myself, "I am ready to go." She wished she lived in Oregon where they have the "Right to Die" legislation. I informed Myra that hospice neither shortens nor lengthens life. When it is your time, you will let go.
Both women have daughters who care. Both daughters are feeling helpless in their ability to do something for their mother. One mother wants to go while the other won't let go. Neither is wrong nor right, although both have some challenging times ahead. I wish both women and their families the best. There is not much else one can do.
BOTH
They both are in their nineties.
Each widowed over twenty years.
Both had been living alone
until a recent decline in their health.
One; her daughter has moved in
while the other now has 24/7 attendant care.
Both needing the extra help;
one with total acceptance; the other not so.
She told her daughter, "I am ready to go."
Through tears, her daughter said she understood.
She will give her mother permission to go
as knows her quality of life is no more.
The other, though, is fighting her decline.
She feels she is okay on her own.
She needs help, but is determined to do it alone.
She is angry at her daughter for hiring the help.
I respect independence.
I admire the courage of letting go.
We only walk this walk one time.
Neither family,
I am sure,
not surprised at all.
Saturday, July 18, 2015
Saturday, July 11, 2015
THE COWBOY
"Flo", seventy-eight, suffers from lung cancer and dementia. Flo lives with her husband of fifty-eight years, "Robert". Flo and Robert live on a large ranch. The family loves horses. Throughout their life, they have participated in rodeos and many horse races. Robert worked at a nearby horse ranch for many years.
The couple have three adult children; who all live nearby. One sees many photos displayed in their family room. Each photo shows a family member with a horse. Horses are a big part of this family.
Flo has been in a two week decline to where she no longer can walk and is much weaker. In addition, she is getting more confused. Her appetite is down and she is sleeping more. Flo's doctor made a referral to hospice due to her recent changes.
The hospice nurse and I went out to meet with Flo and her family. The family's ranch is way out in the country. There are a few ranches nearby. Their property is pretty isolated, which Robert loves.
Flo didn't participate in the visit due to her confusion. When one first meets Robert, he presents pretty rough and tough. He was angry that Flo wouldn't try harder. Robert speaks what is on his mind and loves it when others are straight with him. He may say that Flo should try harder, but if you present him with reality, his face becomes very emotional as he understands it is her disease that is limiting her abilities to handle many of her daily tasks.
Robert says his best medicine is riding his horses on the ranch. Robert's daughter, "Penny", says that her dad has always wanted to be in control. Flo's dying is something he cannot control and it is breaking his heart. He presents like a tough guy, but his huge heart shines through. Penny says her parents always have bickered and teased each other. Robert showing his tough side is a lot easier for him as he can then shake off his true emotions.
I was able to communicate with Robert some reality, which was difficult for him. He thanked me for coming and said it did help him. I felt honored as he said, "You are in my circle." He said that was a good thing as not many can get in. His toughness may show, but his huge heart shines through along with his strong love for Flo.
THE COWBOY
He presents rough and tough.
Riding his horses;
walking his ranch.
He loves being outdoors.
Now his heart is breaking.
He doesn't know what to do.
He wants to manage things,
but that is not working well at all.
He is trying to regain some control.
It has always worked for him before.
Somehow it is so much easier
to handle his horses on the ranch.
He has always been a straight shooter.
He appreciates it if you are the same.
If you present him with reality,
he'll tear up and know it is so.
He'll help her the best way he knows.
He'll get angry along the way.
Trying to control the situation,
then go outdoors to settle down;
to ride his horse.
The Cowboy.
The couple have three adult children; who all live nearby. One sees many photos displayed in their family room. Each photo shows a family member with a horse. Horses are a big part of this family.
Flo has been in a two week decline to where she no longer can walk and is much weaker. In addition, she is getting more confused. Her appetite is down and she is sleeping more. Flo's doctor made a referral to hospice due to her recent changes.
The hospice nurse and I went out to meet with Flo and her family. The family's ranch is way out in the country. There are a few ranches nearby. Their property is pretty isolated, which Robert loves.
Flo didn't participate in the visit due to her confusion. When one first meets Robert, he presents pretty rough and tough. He was angry that Flo wouldn't try harder. Robert speaks what is on his mind and loves it when others are straight with him. He may say that Flo should try harder, but if you present him with reality, his face becomes very emotional as he understands it is her disease that is limiting her abilities to handle many of her daily tasks.
Robert says his best medicine is riding his horses on the ranch. Robert's daughter, "Penny", says that her dad has always wanted to be in control. Flo's dying is something he cannot control and it is breaking his heart. He presents like a tough guy, but his huge heart shines through. Penny says her parents always have bickered and teased each other. Robert showing his tough side is a lot easier for him as he can then shake off his true emotions.
I was able to communicate with Robert some reality, which was difficult for him. He thanked me for coming and said it did help him. I felt honored as he said, "You are in my circle." He said that was a good thing as not many can get in. His toughness may show, but his huge heart shines through along with his strong love for Flo.
THE COWBOY
He presents rough and tough.
Riding his horses;
walking his ranch.
He loves being outdoors.
Now his heart is breaking.
He doesn't know what to do.
He wants to manage things,
but that is not working well at all.
He is trying to regain some control.
It has always worked for him before.
Somehow it is so much easier
to handle his horses on the ranch.
He has always been a straight shooter.
He appreciates it if you are the same.
If you present him with reality,
he'll tear up and know it is so.
He'll help her the best way he knows.
He'll get angry along the way.
Trying to control the situation,
then go outdoors to settle down;
to ride his horse.
The Cowboy.
Saturday, July 4, 2015
WHEN?
"Margaret", ninety-three, has been residing in a Board and Care home for three years. She had been fairly active and was able to manage many of her needs. She walked with a walker, had a great appetite and enjoyed her days. She has a very large room with an even larger window facing out to the front garden. Margaret has a hummingbird feeder right outside her window. One of her greatest pleasures was watching the birds feed. In addition, Margaret spent a lot of her day working jigsaw puzzles. Several of her favorite puzzles were displayed on the walls of her bedroom.
Two months ago, Margaret suffered a stroke which left her right side paralyzed. She no longer can walk and needs the staff to maneuver her around in her wheelchair. Margaret's eyesight is failing along with her hearing. One has to speak loudly in order for her to hear what you are saying.
Margaret is widowed and has three children. Her daughter, "Annie", lives nearby and visits every other day. Her two other children live out of the area with infrequent visits due to geographic distance. Margaret doesn't like to be alone as feels so helpless when no one is around. Annie has arranged for visitors to come on the days she cannot be there.
Margaret has a long history of anxiety. Margaret's anxiety was triggered by the hospice nurse and my visit. She thought hospice would prolong her life. Margaret is forgetful and. with the limited hearing, struggled at times to keep up with the conversation. Margaret kept asking the nurse and I how long does she have. She wanted an exact date.
Margaret has no religious belief and feels once someone dies, there is no afterlife. She has no fears about dying at all. She just feels miserable with all of her limitations. She kept asking why she was still here, how long does she have or will hospice be prolonging her life?
Seeing Margaret struggle so, makes me also question why does she, or anyone, have to suffer. I believe we are all here until it is our time to go. I would like to think Margaret has one final lesson for us. Or, on the other hand, one more lesson to learn. I hope with hospice's support, she will find comfort and peace.
WHEN?
"When will this be over?
Why do I have to live this way?"
So many difficult questions
with no satisfactory answers.
Her eyesight is failing.
She struggles to hear what is being said.
No longer able to do those things
which gave her life such pleasure.
She misses doing jigsaw puzzles;
watching the hummingbirds outside;
her favorite shows; enjoying a meal.
No quality of life left for her.
She has no fears about dying.
She is ready for it to come.
She believes once it is over, it is over.
There is nothing more.
With rising anxiety and frustration,
she pleaded with us to help her.
"I want to be invisible; I am done.
How much longer do I have?
When?"
Two months ago, Margaret suffered a stroke which left her right side paralyzed. She no longer can walk and needs the staff to maneuver her around in her wheelchair. Margaret's eyesight is failing along with her hearing. One has to speak loudly in order for her to hear what you are saying.
Margaret is widowed and has three children. Her daughter, "Annie", lives nearby and visits every other day. Her two other children live out of the area with infrequent visits due to geographic distance. Margaret doesn't like to be alone as feels so helpless when no one is around. Annie has arranged for visitors to come on the days she cannot be there.
Margaret has a long history of anxiety. Margaret's anxiety was triggered by the hospice nurse and my visit. She thought hospice would prolong her life. Margaret is forgetful and. with the limited hearing, struggled at times to keep up with the conversation. Margaret kept asking the nurse and I how long does she have. She wanted an exact date.
Margaret has no religious belief and feels once someone dies, there is no afterlife. She has no fears about dying at all. She just feels miserable with all of her limitations. She kept asking why she was still here, how long does she have or will hospice be prolonging her life?
Seeing Margaret struggle so, makes me also question why does she, or anyone, have to suffer. I believe we are all here until it is our time to go. I would like to think Margaret has one final lesson for us. Or, on the other hand, one more lesson to learn. I hope with hospice's support, she will find comfort and peace.
WHEN?
"When will this be over?
Why do I have to live this way?"
So many difficult questions
with no satisfactory answers.
Her eyesight is failing.
She struggles to hear what is being said.
No longer able to do those things
which gave her life such pleasure.
She misses doing jigsaw puzzles;
watching the hummingbirds outside;
her favorite shows; enjoying a meal.
No quality of life left for her.
She has no fears about dying.
She is ready for it to come.
She believes once it is over, it is over.
There is nothing more.
With rising anxiety and frustration,
she pleaded with us to help her.
"I want to be invisible; I am done.
How much longer do I have?
When?"
Sunday, June 28, 2015
TO DO ALONE
“Flora”, ninety-one, suffers from dementia. Flora lives in an assisted living facility as she needs help with all of her daily needs. Flora is widowed and has two children. Her son, “Ted”, lives locally but not able to visit. Ted suffered a stroke six months ago and was hospitalized for several months. He recently contracted scabies at a nursing facility. He is now homebound; quarantined because of his illness. Before he became sick, Ted and his wife would visit Flora several times each week. In addition, Flora has a daughter, “Leslie”, who lives two states away.
Flora has been in a recent decline to where she is becoming much weaker and eating less. Flora needs to be fed as she has forgotten how to feed herself. She is on a pureed diet as coughs easily when eating solid food. Due to her weakness, Flora spends most of her days in her wheelchair or recliner. Flora no longer talks and does not recognize her family.
Due to Flora’s recent decline, the hospice nurse and I went out to admit Flora to our hospice program. Leslie was able to sign all of the appropriate paperwork and fax it back to our hospice office. I spoke with Leslie on the phone during the admission. It was during that phone call when she shared her mother’s belief about the dying process.
Leslie says it is hard as her mother no longer knows who they are, but then, she would like to visit. I told Leslie to do what her heart dictates. She is in a dilemma as wants to visit; but then wants to do things the way her mother would want her to do things. Leslie feels, that if her mother were aware, she would not want her family to come. Leslie has good support and does reach out to her friends. Leslie also shared that she loves to knit, which gives her comfort.
People die the way they live. No one really knows how much Flora understands. Leslie is trying to do the right thing. I wish all of this family the best. They have had some difficult times recently. I hope all get the support they need.
TO DO ALONE
You walk in and immediately see her.
Eyes closed, but not sleeping.
Others sitting around, not interacting.
She in her recliner; all alone.
She looks content and comfortable.
She has such a sweet, kind face.
She no longer remembers much;
how to eat; how to dress; how to talk.
Her son lives nearby,
but unable to come around.
Quarantined with an infection.
Isolated in his own home.
Her daughter lives two states away.
She speaks with the staff each day.
Wanting an update on how mom is doing.
Knowing she is in a persistent decline.
She'd like to visit more,
but knows to stay at home
as her mother always told her,
"Dying is something
you have to do alone."
Flora has been in a recent decline to where she is becoming much weaker and eating less. Flora needs to be fed as she has forgotten how to feed herself. She is on a pureed diet as coughs easily when eating solid food. Due to her weakness, Flora spends most of her days in her wheelchair or recliner. Flora no longer talks and does not recognize her family.
Due to Flora’s recent decline, the hospice nurse and I went out to admit Flora to our hospice program. Leslie was able to sign all of the appropriate paperwork and fax it back to our hospice office. I spoke with Leslie on the phone during the admission. It was during that phone call when she shared her mother’s belief about the dying process.
Leslie says it is hard as her mother no longer knows who they are, but then, she would like to visit. I told Leslie to do what her heart dictates. She is in a dilemma as wants to visit; but then wants to do things the way her mother would want her to do things. Leslie feels, that if her mother were aware, she would not want her family to come. Leslie has good support and does reach out to her friends. Leslie also shared that she loves to knit, which gives her comfort.
People die the way they live. No one really knows how much Flora understands. Leslie is trying to do the right thing. I wish all of this family the best. They have had some difficult times recently. I hope all get the support they need.
TO DO ALONE
You walk in and immediately see her.
Eyes closed, but not sleeping.
Others sitting around, not interacting.
She in her recliner; all alone.
She looks content and comfortable.
She has such a sweet, kind face.
She no longer remembers much;
how to eat; how to dress; how to talk.
Her son lives nearby,
but unable to come around.
Quarantined with an infection.
Isolated in his own home.
Her daughter lives two states away.
She speaks with the staff each day.
Wanting an update on how mom is doing.
Knowing she is in a persistent decline.
She'd like to visit more,
but knows to stay at home
as her mother always told her,
"Dying is something
you have to do alone."
Saturday, June 20, 2015
LIFE'S LOSSES
Ninety-seven year old "Amanda" has been in a recent decline. She has no remarkable health diagnosis, but is just becoming weaker and weary. Where three months ago, she was able to ambulate with her walker, now she is wheelchair bound. Her granddaughter, "Susan", her primary caretaker, states that her grandmother's appetite is half of what it once was. Susan added that, day by day, her grandmother is getting weaker and needing more help.
The hospice nurse and I went out to meet with Susan and Amanda. Amanda was sitting in her bedroom at a table by the window looking outside. She has lost most of her vision and can only see shadows, but stated that she enjoys sitting there. She was so happy for hospice to come as it means she is dying. Amanda is so ready to go. She is tired of living this way; being dependent and in pain. Amanda has arthritis in her hips and knees which causes her pain with any movement.
Amanda will talk about her life and the many losses she has endured. She has outlived two husbands and both of her children. Forty years ago, Susan was scarred from a house fire. Susan said that eight members of the family were in the home that caught fire from a faulty water heater that exploded. Susan's mother and grandfather both died in that fire.
Susan shared that her only family remaining is her grandmother, along with her own daughter and two grandchildren. Susan so understands what a gift life is and how suddenly it can all be taken away. She also understands her grandmother's wish for it all to be over. Amanda kept questioning why she was still here at age ninety-seven. Susan says her grandmother is angry at God, but Amanda feels that once your dead, you are just dead.
Through all of Amanda's sharing of her life and losses, she would easily smile. Amanda had a quick wit and had a great sense of humor. I believe, with this family's history of tragedy, has made the survivors appreciate and cherish life much more. I also believe Amanda's sense of humor might have been a great asset in how she and her granddaughter have coped over the years.
I wish the best for Amanda and her granddaughter. I smile when I think of Amanda. Her legacy is not about loss, but about surviving with grace and humor. There is no better legacy.
LIFE’S LOSSES
She’s had so many losses
in her ninety-seven years.
More than any one person
should ever have to endure.
A water heater explosion
and horrific house fire years ago;
killing her husband and only daughter.
Lifelong scars; some hidden, others not.
Her granddaughter now her caretaker.
Visible scars on her hands and face.
Devoted and dedicated to her grandmother.
Understanding the precious gift of life.
Seven years ago her only son dying from cancer.
She feels it should have been her.
She is now blind, dependent and in pain.
"Why am I living so long like this?"
She has no major disability.
Her body is just wearing out.
In spite of what life has dealt her,
she will easily smile with a quick wit.
One moment, she'll make us all laugh.
The next, she'll question her life.
She wants things to happen quickly.
She is done and ready to go.
Enough of
life's losses.
The hospice nurse and I went out to meet with Susan and Amanda. Amanda was sitting in her bedroom at a table by the window looking outside. She has lost most of her vision and can only see shadows, but stated that she enjoys sitting there. She was so happy for hospice to come as it means she is dying. Amanda is so ready to go. She is tired of living this way; being dependent and in pain. Amanda has arthritis in her hips and knees which causes her pain with any movement.
Amanda will talk about her life and the many losses she has endured. She has outlived two husbands and both of her children. Forty years ago, Susan was scarred from a house fire. Susan said that eight members of the family were in the home that caught fire from a faulty water heater that exploded. Susan's mother and grandfather both died in that fire.
Susan shared that her only family remaining is her grandmother, along with her own daughter and two grandchildren. Susan so understands what a gift life is and how suddenly it can all be taken away. She also understands her grandmother's wish for it all to be over. Amanda kept questioning why she was still here at age ninety-seven. Susan says her grandmother is angry at God, but Amanda feels that once your dead, you are just dead.
Through all of Amanda's sharing of her life and losses, she would easily smile. Amanda had a quick wit and had a great sense of humor. I believe, with this family's history of tragedy, has made the survivors appreciate and cherish life much more. I also believe Amanda's sense of humor might have been a great asset in how she and her granddaughter have coped over the years.
I wish the best for Amanda and her granddaughter. I smile when I think of Amanda. Her legacy is not about loss, but about surviving with grace and humor. There is no better legacy.
LIFE’S LOSSES
She’s had so many losses
in her ninety-seven years.
More than any one person
should ever have to endure.
A water heater explosion
and horrific house fire years ago;
killing her husband and only daughter.
Lifelong scars; some hidden, others not.
Her granddaughter now her caretaker.
Visible scars on her hands and face.
Devoted and dedicated to her grandmother.
Understanding the precious gift of life.
Seven years ago her only son dying from cancer.
She feels it should have been her.
She is now blind, dependent and in pain.
"Why am I living so long like this?"
She has no major disability.
Her body is just wearing out.
In spite of what life has dealt her,
she will easily smile with a quick wit.
One moment, she'll make us all laugh.
The next, she'll question her life.
She wants things to happen quickly.
She is done and ready to go.
Enough of
life's losses.
Saturday, June 13, 2015
SO ALONE
We received a hospice referral today for “Carl”, a sixty-five year old gentleman suffering from end stage cardiac disease. In addition, Carl suffers from dementia and is confused. He was just released from the hospital and transferred to a Skilled Nursing Facility. Carl has no family or friends. The Public Guardian’s Office manages Carl’s affairs.
The hospice nurse and I went out to admit Carl to hospice. Carl was lying in a single room all alone. He was lying on his side with his eyes open. He appeared much older than his years. He is on a feeding tube and uses oxygen. He did not talk or respond at all when the nurse was examining him.
Carl has a highly contagious infection. The hospice nurse had to put on a gown, gloves and mask in order to go in. Gowning up adds another layer of separation. I stood outside by the doorway watching the nurse to see how or if Carl would respond. He continued to lie there with no reaction at all.
This was a late afternoon admission and I was unable to speak with Carl’s Public Guardian as he was gone for the day. I had so many questions about Carl and his life. Did he wish for his life to end so alone this way? Would he want a loved one by his side? I felt such sadness for him. We are social beings and dying is such an unknown journey as we all only do it once. Does he wish to spend his remaining time alone?
Carl's quality of life is so diminished. Would he want a feeding tube that may prolong his life? Sometimes death is not the worse option. I wish him peace and hope that he finds his perfection when he crosses over to the other side.
SO ALONE
He has no family that we are aware.
There are no friends who come and visit.
The Public Guardian’s Office manages things.
He is isolated and so alone.
Did he push his family away?
Is there anyone who really cares?
Was he a loner; a hermit;
did he choose to be so alone?
Now he just lies there with his eyes open.
He doesn’t respond or speak at all.
He has a feeding tube that gives him nourishment;
oxygen to help him breathe.
The nursing staff takes care of his physical needs.
They treat him with compassion and show their concern.
Is he uncomfortable with them fussing about?
Would he rather be just left alone?
There are those of us who like our solitude.
There are those who relish privacy.
Somehow, though, it seems a bit scary,
when one is dying
to be so alone.
I hope he can feel our compassion.
I hope he knows that there are many who do care.
I’d like to think he will be surrounded by love
when it is his time to go to the other side;
to be never again left
so alone.
The hospice nurse and I went out to admit Carl to hospice. Carl was lying in a single room all alone. He was lying on his side with his eyes open. He appeared much older than his years. He is on a feeding tube and uses oxygen. He did not talk or respond at all when the nurse was examining him.
Carl has a highly contagious infection. The hospice nurse had to put on a gown, gloves and mask in order to go in. Gowning up adds another layer of separation. I stood outside by the doorway watching the nurse to see how or if Carl would respond. He continued to lie there with no reaction at all.
This was a late afternoon admission and I was unable to speak with Carl’s Public Guardian as he was gone for the day. I had so many questions about Carl and his life. Did he wish for his life to end so alone this way? Would he want a loved one by his side? I felt such sadness for him. We are social beings and dying is such an unknown journey as we all only do it once. Does he wish to spend his remaining time alone?
Carl's quality of life is so diminished. Would he want a feeding tube that may prolong his life? Sometimes death is not the worse option. I wish him peace and hope that he finds his perfection when he crosses over to the other side.
SO ALONE
He has no family that we are aware.
There are no friends who come and visit.
The Public Guardian’s Office manages things.
He is isolated and so alone.
Did he push his family away?
Is there anyone who really cares?
Was he a loner; a hermit;
did he choose to be so alone?
Now he just lies there with his eyes open.
He doesn’t respond or speak at all.
He has a feeding tube that gives him nourishment;
oxygen to help him breathe.
The nursing staff takes care of his physical needs.
They treat him with compassion and show their concern.
Is he uncomfortable with them fussing about?
Would he rather be just left alone?
There are those of us who like our solitude.
There are those who relish privacy.
Somehow, though, it seems a bit scary,
when one is dying
to be so alone.
I hope he can feel our compassion.
I hope he knows that there are many who do care.
I’d like to think he will be surrounded by love
when it is his time to go to the other side;
to be never again left
so alone.
Friday, June 5, 2015
DAY BY DAY
“Leonard”, eighty-seven, was diagnosed with lung cancer four months ago. The cancer has already spread to his spine. In addition, he suffers from dementia. Leonard lives with “June”, his wife of sixty-four years. They had four sons. Their youngest son died forty-five years ago in a motor vehicle accident.
In addition, their eldest son, “Leonard, Jr”, suffered brain damage from a tractor accident two years before his younger brother‘s death. It was the summer before Leonard, Jr's Senior year in high school. June said that Leonard, Jr, was an amazing baseball player. The New York Yankees were scouting him. The Yankees were willing to wait until he graduated from high school. After the accident, Leonard was in a coma for months. June said there was no rehab in those days so she brought her son home. She cared for her son for years. Leonard now lives nearby in an Assisted Living Center.
Leonard, Sr. was admitted to hospice as he has been in a rapid decline since his new diagnosis of lung cancer. He is eating very little and is very weak. Fortunately for June, her son, “Lou”, lives with her and is available to help. Lou was a chef by trade. A few years ago, Lou was cooking at a charity function. While helping set up, a pallet of food fell against him causing a severe back injury. Due to pain, it is difficult for him to stand up for any length of time. He is now on disability.
In spite of all the tragedy this family has endured, both Lou and June have such positive attitudes toward life. They each look at the love and the faith that they have. While June was sharing all of these losses with me, I would ask her how does she cope with it all. Her answer was always the same, “Day by day.”
June is a prime example of a tough spirit and a soft heart. Her strong faith along with the love of her family is what keeps her going. I admire her spunk and her spirit.
DAY BY DAY
He was diagnosed four months ago.
His decline has been swift.
He’s not eating much at all now.
She knows it won’t be long.
Tragedy has hit two of their sons.
A third is disabled, but able to help.
So many losses during one lifetime.
She says she copes, “Day by day.”
She has an amazing spirit.
Her family is right by her side.
The tough times have made them stronger,
“We are closer now than ever before.”
She has such a strong faith.
She knows he will be with God.
It gives her comfort; it gives her peace;
it helps her cope,
“Day by day.”
In addition, their eldest son, “Leonard, Jr”, suffered brain damage from a tractor accident two years before his younger brother‘s death. It was the summer before Leonard, Jr's Senior year in high school. June said that Leonard, Jr, was an amazing baseball player. The New York Yankees were scouting him. The Yankees were willing to wait until he graduated from high school. After the accident, Leonard was in a coma for months. June said there was no rehab in those days so she brought her son home. She cared for her son for years. Leonard now lives nearby in an Assisted Living Center.
Leonard, Sr. was admitted to hospice as he has been in a rapid decline since his new diagnosis of lung cancer. He is eating very little and is very weak. Fortunately for June, her son, “Lou”, lives with her and is available to help. Lou was a chef by trade. A few years ago, Lou was cooking at a charity function. While helping set up, a pallet of food fell against him causing a severe back injury. Due to pain, it is difficult for him to stand up for any length of time. He is now on disability.
In spite of all the tragedy this family has endured, both Lou and June have such positive attitudes toward life. They each look at the love and the faith that they have. While June was sharing all of these losses with me, I would ask her how does she cope with it all. Her answer was always the same, “Day by day.”
June is a prime example of a tough spirit and a soft heart. Her strong faith along with the love of her family is what keeps her going. I admire her spunk and her spirit.
DAY BY DAY
He was diagnosed four months ago.
His decline has been swift.
He’s not eating much at all now.
She knows it won’t be long.
Tragedy has hit two of their sons.
A third is disabled, but able to help.
So many losses during one lifetime.
She says she copes, “Day by day.”
She has an amazing spirit.
Her family is right by her side.
The tough times have made them stronger,
“We are closer now than ever before.”
She has such a strong faith.
She knows he will be with God.
It gives her comfort; it gives her peace;
it helps her cope,
“Day by day.”
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