RETIREMENT

 About five weeks ago, I would suddenly become lightheaded, short of breath and weak.  After multiple tests being normal, I was diagnosed with Orthostatic Hypotension.  My blood pressure would suddenly drop after any strong exertion.  My husband and I have done a lot of research, along with guidance from my physician, and I am learning slow and gentle behaviors.  I am slowly getting stronger and able to do a lot more.  

Due to those limitations, I strongly know that I cannot do hospice social work any longer.  I am grieving that loss but know that is my reality.  My focus is on getting stronger and being aware of my new “normal”.  I will then let go and flow to where my journey takes me.  

The staff had a celebration for me today in the office.  Being there today was wonderful.  I was with my co-workers/family.  I felt that before long, I likely may be back in another role.  That is what keeps me going.  

My Blog may not have weekly stories, but I will likely continue to write poetry.   I would love for you to check in now and then.  Thank you for all of your support these past 17 years I have been posting.  It means a lot.

 RETIREMENT

Today was my last day at hospice.

I am now officially retired. 
I thought I would work for many years more,

but the arrow flew directly into my heart.

I was diagnosed with something I never heard of,

but it is a common occurrence among us all.

With any quick exertion, my blood pressure drops

resulting in light headiness and shortness of breath.

There is no cure or treatment but knowing how to go slow.

It’s best to walk slowly, rise from a chair gradually and be gentle.

I am getting stronger daily following these guidelines.

Once I know my new baseline, I will let go and allow my journey to flow.

Hospice had a celebration party for me today

which totally melted my heart.

Hearing how I was a mentor, a hugger, and a teacher.

All said with sadness as not wanting me to go.

I know I made a difference at hospice;

to the patients, to the families, and staff alike.

I know that I will never be ready

to ever completely give any of that up.

I may have officially retired, but I am not, quite yet, done.

So strongly, I believe, from deep within my heart,

I may volunteer or help hospice in some other way as

                         I know that, before long, 

                                                  I will be back.

QUALITY OF LIFE

“Daniel”, sixty years old, was diagnosed with End Stage Kidney Disease recently.  Daniel has spent many years living on the streets.  He recently had been living in a rooming house surrounded by drugs and crime.  Daniel’s only family is a cousin, “Gene” living about twenty miles south.  When the hospice nurse admitted Daniel three days ago to hospice, he did not know his cousin’s phone number.  Many patients at Joshua’s House have a history of drugs or poor choices.  They have burnt many bridges and are alienated from their families.

While meeting with Daniel today, I asked him about his emergency contact.  He then named his cousin Gene.  He then gave me Gene’s phone number.  After the visit, I called Gene.  Gene was so supportive and caring.  I gave him the address of our shelter, “Joshua’s House”.  He then lovingly said, “I will visit him tomorrow”.  I felt so good about this visit.  In the end, I believe most of us are good people.  We all do make wrong decisions at times, but for most of us, we learn and move on.  Good luck Daniel and Gene.

QUALITY OF LIFE

He's been homeless for many years.

He spoke about his hardships;

living in a rooming house;

drugs; theft and crime.

He now has end-stage kidney disease.

He needs to go on dialysis.

He chose not to as so strongly wants

                         “Quality of life.”

He is very weak and mostly stays in bed.

He is eating about one-fourth of his food.

He gets short of breath with exertion.

With no dialysis, his life is now down to weeks.

He was admitted to our hospice shelter

for terminally ill patients who are homeless.

Five cabins; three bedrooms in each;

along with a bathroom and kitchen.

Private rooms with a large closet.

A hospital bed with a TV nearby.

Free food and comfort along with

twenty-four-hour hospice care.

He denied any fears about it all.

He has a strong faith that supports him.

“This place is wonderful and comforting.

This truly does define so perfectly to me;

                         Quality of life.”