SELF CARE

The hospice nurse and I met “Jeff” today.  He is the caregiver for his mother, who is a patient at a Skilled Nursing Facility.  She was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease four years ago.  Jeff had been caring for her at home, but her needs became too much for him.  Two years ago, he placed her in the facility.  

Jeff is also the caregiver for his sister, who suffers from Schizophrenia.  She needs help from her brother.  Jeff’s total focus is on caring for his family and not looking at his own needs.  Self-care is so important, but at times, hard to do because of other life’s demands. 

Jeff was honest with his emotions, grief and stress.  He was so truthful about it all.  He admitted he was an alcoholic, but stated that he did not have time to care for himself.  I spoke with him about the importance of self-care in order to continue to care for his family.  

When I referred him to AA, he stated that he did not have the time to attend meetings.   Then I remembered that last week I first heard about AA meetings on Zoom.  When I referred him to AA on Zoom, his face lit up as he stated, “I may try that”.  I hope he does as self-care is so important for us all.

SELF CARE

 

I met him at the facility today.

He is his mother’s primary support.

With her confusion and weakness,

he could no longer care for her at home.

 

He also is the caregiver for his sister.

She lives with him and needs help as well.

She suffers from Schizophrenia

needing some supervision now and then.

 

He spoke about his stress; his anxiety;

being the only one in the family who cares.

He has no time to think about his needs

as his primary focus is totally on them.

 

When asked, “What helps you cope?”,

he responded with his honesty; his truth;

“I drink.  I know I should stop, but cannot;

although I haven’t had a drink for six days”.

 

I spoke about the importance of self-care,

in order to continue to support his family;

and how he so needs to nurture himself.

I recommended he attend an AA meeting.

 

He responded that he has no time.

But then, I remembered what I learned last week.

I heard about AA meetings on Zoom.

I spoke to him about that as another option.

 

His face lit up as did not know about it.

He stated that he will look into it for support.

As he walked away, he quietly turned and softly said,

                         “You were guided to be here.”