We went out today to admit “Sandy”, to our Hospice program. Sandy is married to her husband, “Bill” for over forty years. It was immediately so clear at how much he loves his wife. His kindness and softness toward her is so beautiful.
The couple has two sons, who both live on the East Coast and not available to help. The couple are isolated as Bill’s whole focus is solely caring for Sandy. Sandy was very thin as has a poor appetite. She is forgetting how to swallow and will pocket food. She has lost over twelve pounds this past month.
Bill spoke of feeling overwhelmed and anxious due to caregiver demands. He puts Sandy’s needs first, while neglecting his own. He does have a caregiver that comes twice a week for two hours. It allows Bill to run errands as needed.
Hospice has
a volunteer available to visit four hours each week to give Bill some
respite. I referred him to a local
agency that receives grants in order to donate caregiver hours to
families. Hopefully Bill will receive his
much-needed additional support as he so strongly needs our help as much as
Sandy does.
COMPLETE LOVE
She is only
sixty-four years old,
but looks
fifteen years older.
All because
of being diagnosed
two years ago,
with Alzheimer’s Disease.
The two of
them met in college years ago;
while each were
pursuing a nursing degree.
They have so
much in common
as have been
happily married over forty years.
The moment
we walked into their living room,
I
immediately noticed how gentle; how kind; how beautiful
he was while
quietly sitting by her side.
His voice
was soft and smooth while comforting her.
She no
longer can carry on any conversation
as her
speech is garbled while she mumbles.
He easily
helps her up from the chair to walk a bit
as doesn’t
want her muscles to become weak.
He is
totally focused on her immediate needs,
while not taking
care of himself much at all.
There is no
family or friends available to help
which makes
him feel overwhelmed and anxious.
He is so
beautifully caring for her,
while
neglecting his own stressful needs.
He needs our
help more than she;
all because
of his pure love; his complete love.
The most beautiful gift of
all.
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