LETTING GO

"Wendy", fifty-two years old, was diagnosed with brain cancer seven years ago. Wendy lived alone and, until one month ago, was managing her life well. She had to stop working a few months ago due to treatment options that were available.

Wendy has two young children; a son, "Mitchell; 22 years old, and a daughter, "Vickie: who is 28. Both children are devoted to their mother. This past month has been difficult as Wendy was slowly becoming weaker and needing more help. Ten days ago she was hospitalized due to needing urgent treatment.

Yesterday Wendy was transferred to a Skilled Nursing Facility. Wendy is imminent and no longer eating or drinking. She sleeps most of the day, awakening up for only a few moments. The two children are very realistic and are aware of their mother's status and very poor outcome. They wanted to be able to see their mother to say goodbye. Due to the Corona Virus and "Social Isolation", the facility did not allow any visitors or families.

I was able to talk to the Administrator and was informed that a Doctor's note was required stating that the patient was "Actively Dying". Hospice works so strongly as a team. I was able to call one of the nurses, who was in the hospice office, to assist with getting our Medical Director to sign such a note.

I spoke with Vickie this evening. She and her brother were able to go in and say goodbye to their mother. Vickie said that both of them told their mom that is was okay to let go. Vickie had tears while sharing that visit. It is such a perfect example of how strong the impact of "Social Isolation" affects each and every one of us. I am so grateful that they were able to have that last visit with their mom.


LETTING GO

Her decline was so rapid.
In one month, so much has changed.
Where she was living alone; managing her life;
now imminent with only a few days.

She was transferred to a facility yesterday
so she could receive that special care.
No longer eating or drinking.
          Sleeping most of her days.

"Social Isolation" has changed all rules.
No visitors or families allowed.
Requesting a doctor's note that clearly states,
          "She is actively dying."

The note was quickly faxed.
It allowed she and her brother inside.
They were able to say those special words.
They were able to say "Goodbye".

"Mom, go when you are ready to go.
We are going to be alright."
They shared their grieving hearts
giving her graceful permission to go.

Seeing her suffer is so terribly hard;
but then you don't ever want her to leave.
Unfortunately you know there is no other option
but for both of you to allow her
          to peacefully;
                   to lovingly let go.