TO LET GO

We met "Samantha" and her husband, "Jimmy" three days ago. Samantha had recently started dialysis as had been in a recent two month slow decline. Samantha has had multiple medical problems through most of her adult life. In her early twenties, she received radiation for treatment which impacted her health greatly.

Samantha worked with infants and babies. She lit up when talking about her work. It was her passion; her love. Samantha had a strong desire to travel the world. She and Jimmy retired early in order to have time to travel. Both of them knew that, at any time, Samantha's health could easily limit their adventures.

Samantha was interested in hospice. The hospice nurse and I met Samantha and Jimmy three days ago to educate them on our program. Medicare has strict criteria regarding if a patient is eligible for hospice. Hospice is a comfort care, palliative care program; not curative. Dialysis is considered curative by Medicare.

Samantha had dialysis the day after we met. It was then she knew she wanted hospice and not dialysis. She was aware that when patients stop dialysis treatment they may have only days to a few weeks to live. Per her husband, Samantha was ready "to let go."

Three days later, this morning, the nurse and I went back to admit Samantha to hospice. I was shocked at how much she declined in such a short period of time. She was weak three days ago, but vital in her words and mannerisms. Today she was in a deep sleep in her bed. She was very hard to arouse. She appeared imminent.

Jimmy was so aware, but was a bit torn, as did not want his wife to die, but he loved her with all of his heart to be able to let her go. Blessings to both of you.

ADDENDUM: Samantha died peacefully five days later with her family at her bedside. Speaking with Jimmy afterwards, he stated, "She did it all her way. It was her time "to just let go."


TO LET GO　

She only just started dialysis
to curb her recent decline.
She's a fighter; she's tough,
doing what she needs to do.

She's been sick for decades.
She's had many "up and down" days.
Always aware that her life could be cut short,
she's lived each day to the fullest.

She's followed her dreams.
She's embraced each day.
Working at a job she loves;
traveling all over the world.

We met her three days ago.
She spoke extensively about her life.
Her recent decline is a strong reminder
that it may be close for her to let go.

The next day, she chose to stop dialysis
knowing she may have a few weeks at most.
We returned to admit her to hospice today.
She is imminent; barely breathing.

She was in a deep sleep while he did the paperwork.
With tears he shared, "I will cry, but have a lot of support."
It's hard, but he knows she is doing things her way.
          "She chose her time
                   to just let go."