"CALL YOLO HOSPICE!"

I had heard about Yolo Hospice while I was working at a large medical center's hospice program for over eleven years. The medical center's hospice received so many referrals that they did not have the staff to take on all of them. They delegated half of their referrals to other local hospices. During the course of my work there, I only heard positive feedback about Yolo Hospice.

Three years ago, fate led me to Yolo Hospice. Yolo Hospice is where I need to be and I am so happy that I did, at that time, call Yolo Hospice. When I left my job, our quality nurse, when finding out I was going to Yolo Hospice, said, "You chose the best." I too know that what she said was so true.

One of Yolo Hospice's competitors is a large for profit hospice. I have heard so many complaints about this hospice from staff, family etc. The daughter of the patient we admitted today, has a friend who works for that large for profit hospice. It was that friend who told the daughter to "Call Yolo Hospice!"

I am so blessed and proud to work for Yolo Hospice. Staff are able to care for patients and families as directed by the patients and families themselves, for as long as it takes.

The rewards are amazing as seen on folks faces or by the loving words they share. I feel honored to be a part of such an amazing non-profit hospice.


"CALL YOLO HOSPICE!"

The call came right before closing yesterday.
"Please come out as soon as you can.
My friend told me to,
          "Call Yolo Hospice!"

This family had used a competitive hospice
who admitted their father yesterday afternoon.
The kids said the nurse felt cold and uncaring.
Worrying only about the paperwork.

We went out quickly today
to admit their father to our hospice program..
The patient and his kids shared many family stories.
They all needed to talk and to vent.

We immediately listened and laughed with them.
This family had so much love and compassion.
Moments later, the two kids silently looked at each other,
affirming us, by smiling while nodding their heads.

They guided us to where they needed to go;
feeling our empathy, our hearts.
Both the nurse and I are extremely happy
that the two kids did
          "Call Yolo Hospice!"  

CHALLENGES

The hospice nurse and I went out to admit, "Carmen", a forty-one year old, suffering from liver cancer. Carmen, an immigrant from Mexico, has lived in the United States for over twenty years. She speaks Spanish and does not understand much of the English language.

Upon entering her home, we found Carmen sitting on the couch. She was so frail and thin. She sat quietly while wrapped in a big woolen blanket. She greeted us, but appeared somber at first. Carmen's sister was there and acted as the interpreter. Once we started talking about Carmen and her family's needs, we informed them about hospice support.

Carmen started to trust us and opened up quickly. She had the cutest sense of humor. She was such a joyful person, I felt instantly connected to her. She has two teenagers which she raised as a single mom. Her income was very low as she had worked in the fields for many years. She had so many challenges in her life, but accepted each one as it came along.

She was tearful when talking about not being ready to leave her family or friends. Carmen so embraced life and those people in her life. It was not surprising that she had such a supportive family with a huge network of friends.

Carmen is such a special person and I felt honored to have met her. I have done hospice work for a long time and still have no answer as to why some folks have to cope with such a devastating illness. I don't believe there is an answer. It is just so random. I only wish Carmen the best.


CHALLENGES

Her life has been full of challenges.
A single mom; hard work in the field; now cancer.
Her beautiful smile, her sense of humor
has helped her cope so well.

She was sitting on the couch
when we walked into her home.
Quietly wrapped in a woolen blanket.
Withered, emaciated, weak.

She didn’t speak our language
so her sister translated the words.
But her heart, her spirit spoke so clearly,
we deeply understood how she did feel.

Through all of the struggles,
her gracefulness brilliantly shown through.
Her eloquence, her dignity
truly stole all of our hearts.

She cried so genuinely
when I asked her about her fears.
She’s not yet ready
to leave her young children;
         her family or her friends.

She is one special gal  
whom I feel honored to have met.
I know she will face her upcoming challenges
with her beautiful smile;
          spiritual dignity,
                   and with her own special grace. 

TWENTY YEARS AGO

My friend, Kate, died twenty years ago today from breast cancer. I had met Kate five years prior at where we both worked. At that time, she had been in remission from her cancer. On March 17, 1997, she learned that her cancer was back. Kate gracefully accepted what her doctor told her. She went through many treatments including a stem-cell transplant. After her hospitalizations for that transplant, she stayed in an apartment on the hospital's property for two weeks. The first week, I took vacation time and stayed with her, while her sister was there the second week.

Kate was always so easy going and quietly accepted her fate. After the transplant, she slowly went downhill. There was a group of her girlfriends who all shared caring for Kate; myself included. I donated platelets and drove her to treatments. I wanted to do so much more to help, but felt limited as could not take the disease away. I have worked in the medical field my entire career and have a lot of knowledge, but it is so different when it is someone you know and love.

Kate died two months after Lady Diana. Elton John sang "Candle in the Wind" at Diana's memorial. I associate that particular song with Kate's death as well. I heard Elton John singing that song on the radio today. I know Kate was telling me that she is doing fine.

Kate taught me so much about life and death. She taught me grace and beauty. Her dying and death totally changed my life in so many amazing ways. Even twenty years later, I think of Kate so much. It was her powerful presence that taught me so well. I pray that I can continue to honor her; such a special soul.


TWENTY YEARS AGO

You were with me all day today.
I felt your presence;
          I felt your comfort;
                   I strongly felt your love.

You were such a special gift to me  
and to all those who were around.
You taught us all about life
while traveling your delicate journey.

You never complained.
You totally accepted your fate.
Taking each day as it came.
Embracing those who loved you too.

You were my greatest teacher.
A Grandmaster of them all.
Lessons I have never forgotten;
priceless gifts to be beheld.

It was twenty years ago today
that you went to the other side.
Your life changed dramatically
          and so did mine. 

A THOUSAND FOLD

I admitted a new patient to hospice today. The patient was in her mid-eighties and had suffered from cardiac disease for many years. She is now unresponsive and imminent with death likely within hours to a few days.

I met with her husband, her son and her daughter to inform them about hospice and the support we are able to give to all of them. Part of my role as the Admission Social Worker, is to explain the role of each member of the hospice team. As I was explaining the chaplain role, I often like to elaborate on how their support is spiritual. So often folks will feel a chaplain will come in and only read the bible to the patient.

I will clarify that yes, religion is spiritual, but spirituality is so much more. It is one's philosophy and beliefs about life. Several years ago, a male patient shared that his spirituality was his motorcycle and I believed him. I added that our chaplain will offer spiritual support as defined by the patient and the family.

It was then that the patient's son shared those most beautiful words to me. This is a prime example of why I continue to do the hospice work that I do. It is not work, but a life's calling for me. This family so validated why I, and my colleagues, continue to do hospice. The benefits are so amazing.

ADDENDUM: Back at the office, I heard that the patent died peacefully, with the family at the bedside, two hours after I left. I wish them all peace.


A THOUSAND FOLD

As hospice workers,
we often get asked,
"How can you do,
          what you do?"

Walking along next to others
who are facing an emotional ordeal,
we often hear how much we have helped.
Giving it back to us a thousand fold.

Today's family was so inspiring.
Coping, grieving, loving, realistic.
Easily verbalizing their emotions and grief.
Embracing the blessings that are still around.

His wife, their mother.
Imminent, unresponsive.
Likely hours to only a few days.
Giving her permission to go,
as they know she is going to a better place.

I spoke about our hospice team
and the support we all can give;
when he shared the most beautiful words to me,
"You are giving us all that we need."

"You are listening to us.
You are hearing what we have to say.
You are doing what we all so deeply need.
We cannot thank you enough."

I had tears when I heard his words.
They are struggling with such a major loss,
but still able to share the kindness of their hearts.
Thanking me for just being there.

Giving it back to me
          A Thousand Fold.