Sunday, September 24, 2017

TWO SPIRITS

We admitted a 44 year old patient to hospice today. "Raymond" suffered from terminal cancer that he has been struggling with for many years. Raymond has three children that he has been raising as a single parent. He recently moved in with his sister and her family as he needed the support.

Raymond is hoping that his sister can get custody of his children. Raymond will tell you what is going on in his life; good or bad, with a huge smile on his face. I instantly felt a strong connection to him because of his positive attitude on life. Raymond expressed so much love and kindness.

He held my hand in both of his and didn't want to let go. He felt, as did I, a strong bond between us. I helped him walk to the bathroom and he turned to me and said how we were so much alike. Raymond determinedly told me that "When one finds another soul like yours, both will know."

Raymond and I spoke different languages, but no words were needed. It felt like our spirits were communicating on such a higher level. I will never forget Raymond or this profound spiritual moment.


TWO SPIRITS 

He instantly welcomed us
with such a remarkably warm smile.
I immediately saw his amazing spirit.
It was all about love and appreciation.

He easily verbalized all of his blessings to us
being thankful for all that he had.
His strong faith supported him tremendously,
"God will guide me.
          I am so happy".

He was twenty years my junior.
We did not speak the same language,
but it didn't matter much at all
as our two spirits combined as one.

He showed me a piece of heaven today.
Totally connecting to another
without a word being spoken.
Completely understanding it all.

He clasped my hand in both of his
not ever wanting to let go.
He said we were so much alike
having love and kindness in our hearts.

I was in awe of him.
I admired his courage; his strength.
He captured me fully with his love.
He completely embraced
          both me and
                   My Heart. 

Friday, September 15, 2017

WHY HER?

Forty-five year old “Maureen” was admitted to hospice today due to a major infection. She was diagnosed with such a crippling disease two years ago. She is a quadriplegic, bedridden and dependent upon all of her needs. Fortunately, Maureen has such a large, devoted and caring family. One feels the love once you first step into her home.

Maureen smiles so easily and is at peace about her life. She embraces her family and so appreciates the loving support she receives. Maureen has accepted her situation without fears. Her strong Christian faith helps her cope as she knows she is going to a better place.

Seeing someone in such a challenging circumstance, brings up so many questions for me as to why was she given so much to deal with. She is such a teacher to us all. Maybe she was chosen because she surely is the special one. But still.........


WHY HER?

Why her?
She got pounded so hard.
Way more than her fair share.
What's it all about?

Why do some have to struggle so?
Why is their life so hard?
She has so much love inside of her.
It just feels so unfair.

She is in her mid forties.
She is bedridden, unable to move.
Totally dependent upon her family.
There is nothing at all she can do.

She smiles so easily
embracing the love that's around.
She has no fears or concerns at all.
Her strong Christian faith helps her through.

It brings up so many questions.
Why was she struck this way?
Maybe it is because she is a special one
to teach us tolerance, endurance and love.

I just know it just doesn't feel fair
for her to battle so hard.
What's it all about?
          Why her?
 

Saturday, September 2, 2017

BOTH PARENTS

Two days ago, our hospice received a referral for "Al", an elderly gentleman with a long history of cardiac disease. Al resides in a nursing home and is dependent with all of his needs. The doctor made a hospice referral as Al was in a rapid decline. Al stopped eating several days ago as could no longer swallow. He is now bedridden and hard to awaken. It is only a matter of time.

I called Al's daughter, "Jean", to schedule a hospice admission visit. Jean said that she was in Southern California as her mother was just admitted into a hospice there. Jean spoke of having a need to be in both places at the same time. Jean's sister lives near their mother and Jean knew her mother wouldn't be left unattended, but she still struggled to leave her mother's side.

Hearing Jean's story made me so sad. I just do not understand why some folks get more than their fair share. The hospice nurse and I met Jean late this afternoon to admit her father to our program. Jean was exhausted as spent her day driving 500 miles to get to her father's side.

She said that she hasn't even begun to grieve as is focusing on all of the tasks that need to be done. She shared that once all of this is over, is when she will start to grieve. She said that now it is just so overwhelming and surreal.

Jean has been on my mind for several days since the initial phone call. Somehow life is just not fair and equal to all of us. This is a small, but close loving family. Having that love and support will help both Jean and her sister to get through this challenging time.


BOTH PARENTS

Her parents divorced years ago
when she and her sister were in their teens.
Mom lives in the southern part of the state,
while dad lives eight hours north.

Each parent has a daughter living nearby
which was helpful as mom and dad aged.
Their needs slowly increased throughout the years,
but overall, each was doing okay.

Recently though, dad's health caught up with him.
He could no longer live alone.
She moved him into a nursing home
to get the around-the-clock care he needed.

It all has suddenly changed.
He is confused and hard to awaken.
He is no longer eating or drinking.
It is just a matter of days.

I called her to schedule a hospice admission visit.
She said she'd be home in a few days.
She is hours away with her sister,
comforting mom with hospice there too.

They both are trying to process their emotions.
It is so overwhelming and surreal.
Together they are putting one foot in front of the other.
How do they even begin to grieve

          Both parents?