EATING OUT

“Caroline”, sixty-seven, has been on hospice for almost two years. She suffers from lung cancer. Caroline was retired from her job as a concierge for a large hotel downtown. She was very sociable and had strong relationships with all of the staff at the surrounding restaurants.

The managers of the restaurants would offer Caroline free meals hoping that she would send hotel guests their way. Caroline loved to eat out and would gladly take them up on their offer. She lived downtown near many of her favorite dining places and frequented them on her own time as well.

When Caroline came onto hospice, she used a walker to ambulate. She was slow, but several times each week, was determined to walk the short distance to her favorite places near her home for lunch. Caroline was declining, but her strong will kept her going. It got to a point where she could no longer stay in her own home. Her home had many stairs which she could no longer maneuver.

She moved into an independent senior complex nearby. In addition to the independent living section, the facility had an assisted living center and nursing home wing. Caroline’s two children wanted her to be in a place to where she could have access to increased care as needed.

This past week, the children and I have been working on the paperwork to get their mother into the assisted living center. Caroline hated the idea, but knew it was going to be a reality soon.

Yesterday, her son spent the day with her. She was pretty weak, but then early afternoon perked up and said she wanted to go to the nursery to get a few plants. Off they went to buy a few plants for her apartment. Returning home near dinner time, her son fixed her a vodka on the rocks, her favorite drink. He was feeling a bit nervous as he knew that the hospice nurse was coming the next day to talk with her about moving to the Assisted Living Section.

This morning about 8:30 AM, the hospice home health aide found Caroline dead in her bed. It was sudden, but then it was perfect for Caroline. She died her way; dining out until the end and able to stay in her independent living apartment. The hospice nurse came out and said her body was still warm. Death had to have been pretty recent.

Thirty minutes before, Caroline’s daughter was driving her son, Caroline’s grandson, to kindergarten. It was during that drive to school when her grandson talked about what he saw. Both of Caroline’s children have comfort knowing their mother died the way she wanted. They are not surprised to know that she continues to eat out and is making friends.


EATING OUT

He called his great-grandma “GG”.
She’s been gone for about a year.
His grandmother goes by “Nana”.
He knows she’s been sick for a while.

Nana had to move to a different home.
A place where they had more care.
She was still able to eat lunch out.
Her favorite thing to do.

He knows she’s been getting weaker,
because she sleeps a whole lot more.
But she’ll still find the energy to enjoy a meal
at her favorite restaurants nearby.

Driving to kindergarten this morning .
he told his mom what he was seeing.
“I see GG with Nana.
They are sitting together having lunch”.

His mom asked where they were sitting.
“There are no tables in heaven.
They are sitting on the lawn.
Nana is making lots of friends there.”

A few moments later, the aide found his Nana.
She must have died in her sleep.
It was a shock as the day before she went shopping;
she had a cocktail before dinner.

Children’s connection to the other side is strong.
The are open to receive what may come.
A beautiful scene of GG and Nana
doing what they both loved to do;
          Eating out.