HUGS

I just flew home from spending three days with my friends Judy and Ray. Ray was diagnosed with cancer four months ago and has been declining rapidly since then. He is so weak and eating very little. His color is ashen and he sleeps most of the day.

This was the first time I saw them since his diagnosis. I couldn't wait to get there to give Judy a big hug. When Judy met me at the baggage claim to pick me up at the airport, I hugged her for so long. I didn't want to let her go. I wanted to ease her pain and let her know that I am and will always be there for her and Ray.

Over the course of the three day trip, I probably hugged Judy every hour on the hour. I needed to have that connection with her. I felt that it was the only thing I could do for her.

I spent some time alone with Ray and I promised him that I would take care of Judy and make sure she will be okay. Judy had asked me to write his obituary and I wanted to ask Ray about what he would want his legacy to be. I started out by saying that Judy had asked me to write.....I paused for a moment and immediately Ray added, "my obituary?"

Ray has accepted his situation from the moment of his diagnosis. He is in good spirits with a quick smile. I am in awe of how he is coping with such a horrific disease.

As Judy dropped me off at the airport, I gave her one final, long hug. It was hard to walk into the terminal and leave her. I know before too long, though, I will return.


HUGS

I have always loved to give hugs.
It's a great way to say hello.
A hug is one of the few things in life
that comes back the moment it's given away.

This time the hugs were so different.
They weren't for goodbye or hello.
I needed to wrap my arms around her.
To protect her from the pain.

I cannot stop him from dying.
I cannot freeze him in time.
He probably has only a few more weeks.
She knows he's slipping away.

All I could do was hug her.
Then hug her again and again.
It's the only way I knew how to comfort her.
The rest is out of our hands.

I wanted her to know I'll always be there
no matter what day or what time.
Her hugs were soothing.
Her embraces so warm.
I guess I needed some hugging too.